Don’t Let the Boogeyman Steal Your Dreams
By Sulana Stone
The boogeyman lurking in the closet scares the bejesus out of little kids. “Big people” know the imaginary monster from their childhood isn’t real. Yet, adults freeze in their tracks when the same monster pops up on their path in life.
The closer we come to reaching our dreams, the more our monstrous emotions and mind-talk flash their urgent warnings, “Stop! Don’t go any further. You can’t pull it off. You’re not good enough. You’re gonna screw up. Or get hurt. Or die!” When you buy into these threats, you can feel confused. Numb. Scattered. Unfocused. So, ask yourself, “Is what the ego telling me true?” If you don’t challenge the propaganda of the boogeyman, you might quit going after your dreams altogether.
When you find yourself waylaid by the ego monster, you can reclaim your power and clarity by using facts from your life as ammunition against the ego.
“Just the Facts, Ma’am”
Remember the old Dragnet TV cop show? Actor Jack Webb played the no-nonsense police detective Sgt. Joe Friday. Often in the course of his questioning, Sgt. Friday was bombarded by the frantic, emotional babbling of confused and upset citizens. To cut to the bottom line, the wise detective somberly requested of the women, “Just the facts, ma’am.”
By gathering facts—and disregarding the misleading interpretations of people’s minds and emotions—the sergeant built a rock solid case.
In order to withstand the dream-shattering attacks of the boogeyman, you need to establish a solid case too. By gathering “just the facts” of your actual accomplishments—and ignoring the inaccurate conclusions of your ego and emotions—you create a solid foundation for creating your dream.
And what did Sgt. Friday do to remember his facts? He wrote ‘em down.
Save Your Dreams with a Journal
With its constant undermining, the ego has an effective weapon to halt your journey to happiness. The invalidation distorts your memory. It narrows your vision. It makes you forget that you are a valuable person. The monster deliberately distracts your attention from the times in your life when you did create what you wanted.
Creating a “Dream-Saver Fact Journal” of your factual successes is an effective active step you can take to dispel the devastating, self-defeating inner talk of the ego. Forget about what you don’t do well, or where you come up short. Jot down what, in fact, has gone well in your life. Especially, log in evidence that proves your ego is wrong about you being unlovable, untalented and unworthy of having what you want.
Friendly Facts Fend Off the Funk
List miracles and major achievements. Add to your journal daily. As you create success, document the specific, hard-core, firsthand, personal direct evidence that you can create your life the way you want it to be. When did you decide you needed more money, then got a raise? When did you decide to get a better job, and a great opportunity “appeared out of nowhere?” When did you want a new friend or lover, and you miraculously found one? Despite the odds being against you, when did you find the perfect place to live? When was there something wrong with your body, and it healed quicker than expected?
The purpose of the Dream-Saver Fact Journal is to remind you that you have succeeded in the past, and therefore, you can triumph now. Your own irrefutable facts will refresh your awareness that you are lovable, talented and worthy!
Also, look for examples in your life where you felt good. Did someone unexpectedly treat you to dinner or a movie? Did you raise the spirits of the grocery clerk who was having a tough day? Did someone call you out of the blue with the information you needed? Keep track of your daily experiences of friendship, kindness, compassion, courage and acknowledgement.
Amass indisputable proof that verifies that you are supported when you follow your heart. Highlight actual events that demonstrate the rewards of expressing your authentic self in the world. Then review your achievements every time your energy and joy begin to wane. Make notes to remind yourself that you’ve been victorious in many situations. Solid evidence causes the boogey monster to lose its power over you.
Move Past the Threats
In my own writing career, I repeatedly consult my Success Journal throughout my process of articulating the inner workings of life. Sometimes as I travel into uncharted territories of authentic expression, the ego roars, “They’ll kill you if you say too much truth! or “They’ll put you away because they think you’re crazy.” Popular variations of the same threat are, “You’ll go insane if …” or “You’ll be alone if …”or “You’ll lose everything if …” Unless I take action to counter my ego, I’m stuck in an emotional muck hole and quickly losing sight of any way out.
Dash the Dastardly Downers
The journal is my lifesaver and ally. This factual source about my life shows me I’m capable of continuing in the direction of my goals. My own clear and undeniable evidence proves that I won’t die, get locked away, go crazy, be alone or lose what’s important.
Call the Bluff of the Ego
Bluffing is a primary skill of a successful poker player. Bluffing is a tactic the boogeyman has to employ since he never really holds the winning cards. When you accumulate a wealth of actual life experience to prove you’ve repeatedly reached your goals, you have a royal flush. You’re holding the winning hand. So, when the ego monster appears, call its bluff! When the ego spins a yarn about how you “always lose,” “get hurt,” or “are going to die,” pull out your ace in the hole: your journal of facts proving you have been able to create what you want in life.
Soothe the Savage Beast
The next time you’re looking for a boost in confidence, don’t listen to your mind and emotions. These rascals frame your life in the worst possible light. Check your Dream-Saver Journal to remind you of the successful final outcome the last time your inaccurate mind and emotions were trying to invalidate you.
When the boogeyman growls “Whoa!” when your heart whispers “Go,” quell the objections of your ego with proof of your creative power. Silence your inner critic. Bore the brute to death with true stories of your worth. Eventually the bellowing monster will turn into a pip-squeak and stop undermining you.
By reminding yourself of “just the facts,” you’ll quiet the mind and soothe the emotions so you can keep moving towards your dream.